Open The Eyes of My Heart

“Having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and what is the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe, according to the working of his great might”
‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭1:18-19‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Our world seems to be moving at such a fast pace. As a Christian, some times I have to remind myself that The Lord is present.  I hate to admit, that sometimes I can do my Bible Study, pray, go to church and still feel like I'm on my own.  A recent Bible study has stuck with me and offered me some much needed clarity and humbleness about times when I feel this way.

In 1 Kings 8, just before Solomon's great prayer of blessing over the new temple, The Lord reveals himself in a cloud of smoke. The cloud filled the temple and even stopped activities until the smoke cleared.

“And when the priests came out of the Holy Place, a cloud filled the house of the Lord, so that the priests could not stand to minister because of the cloud, for the glory of the Lord filled the house of the Lord.”
‭‭1 Kings‬ ‭8:10-11‬ ‭ESV‬‬

I couldn't get this out of my head! I need a cloud of smoke to show me His presence! Wouldn't it bring you comfort when something good or bad happened if you could see that visual puff of smoke to know He is here?  On that day, when we found out my mom had cancer, what if as we were leaving the Doctor's office a could of smoke appeared? A visual reminder that The Lord is in control even when we feel alone.  I know I would love it!

I've had times in my Christian walk when I've struggled to feel Him.  I am so thankful that He has urged me to continue to seek Him - even when I couldn't see or feel Him.  I haven't talked to anyone other than my husband about this - maybe that is normal? I only know how it is for me.

I'm not very good at being quiet. I'm not very good at being still.  Maybe that is why only three times in my life I have heard the words or The Lord.  I couldn't tell you how that compares to others - but for me each time has been special and unique. The most recent happened only three weeks ago.  I was so burdened and concerned that I spent my lunch time praying. No one else around. Just me praising Him for my blessings and laying my concern before His feet.  I finished my prayer, said Amen and seconds later an audible voice said, "I've got this." It shook me because I thought I was alone.  I looked around and I was very much still alone.  I was shaken up! I called my husband first, "The Lord told me He has this!" I called my sister, " The Lord says He had this!" For days it was all I could think about or talk about!

Then, right on cue, I read 1 Kings and the story of the cloud of smoke and the visual sign of God's glory.  I was humbled that I longed so much for a cloud to show me He is here. I know He is here - even when I can't see Him.

Lord,
Forgive me on those days when I doubt Your presence. I praise You for speaking to me that day to give my spirit a jolt. I do not want to be the kind of Christian that doubts Your presence.  I thank You for opening my eyes to Your glory.  I trust in Your Word and Your Word offers assurance over and over of your presence in my life.  Your voice to me that day was beautiful and I praise You for weaving together that prayer and my Bible study. Continue to encourage me to seek You - even when there is no cloud of smoke.
Amen