Fitting In

I remember where I was - Orlando around 20 years ago. I hailed a taxi to get to the airport. As I hopped in, the cab driver welcomed me and a few minutes later said, "There's something different about you? What is it?" Hmmmmmm...my heart jumped alittle....I know what is....but, do I really go there? 

Heart racing - I decided to go for it. "In one word - Jesus. That joy you see isn't because my life is perfect - far from it - but I have a hope and peace from my Lord and Savior. Do you have Jesus?" He did not. He did not accept Jesus on this cab ride and I wonder often if he has opened his heart. 

As we are struggling with raising a young lady in today's culture. I keep being reminded of this day. The countless prayers I've said praying that she would fit in, that she would be surrounded by friends, that she would participate in the "right" activities. Only to be reminded that prayer is not only dangerous - but not the desire of my heart. 

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

‭‭Romans‬ ‭12:2‬ ‭NIV‬‬

I don't want her to look like the world. I don't want her to make poor decisions to be a part of the "group".

I don't want her to be excluded or lonely - but if being excluded means she is standing up for her values - so be it. 

I want her to shine. I want her to be a walking billboard for the joy that comes from Christ. I want her to look different. I want people to see something unique in her. I want them to ask her why she smiles so much. 

I still want her to have friends and enjoy being young. But, I believe the Lord is preparing another girl's (or several girl's) heart to be that friend. Friends that can stand for Jesus. Now, more than ever, our next generation can not be sent off into this cruel world without looking different. Our world has no hope if they look just like everyone else. 

So, she may not be the most popular....she may not be the coolest...she may not be the most talkative. But, I will no longer pray that you "fit in". 

May you be loyal, may you be kind, may you listen more than you talk, may you be respectful, may you be modest, may you be generous, may you be giving, may you be joyful. And...above all...may you be a light for Jesus. May those around you know that your life is a reflection of your Lord and Savior. That it is difficult to not be a part of the crowd. It may even be lonely sometimes - but may the Lord comfort you in those times and be preparing the hearts of those around you to be bold in their faith. 

Lord,

I am burdened for what our children face today. The struggles they face are multiplied by technology and a desire to get as many "likes" as we can. Help me to be a good example for her. Help me to know when to step in and when to back off. Help us to be bold in our faith. Help us to be trustworthy, encouraging and faithful friends. Help us to know that not everyone has to be part of our inner circle - but we show love and kindness to all. Help our lives to look different than society. No matter your age that is not always easy. Thank you for the gift of being a mom. 

Amen

Girl Time

                                                         
John has been traveling for work a little recently. I hate for him to be traveling. I miss him and all the little things he does to take care of us.  I realize when he is gone how much he does that sometimes goes un noticed.

But,  I also get excited about spending some one on one time with MP.  I love being with her.  When it is the two of us, she tells me funny things that normally she wouldn't say.  We laugh, sometimes we cry, but we really get to know each other. We eat popcorn and play games and enjoy being together!

I tell her what I was like when I was her age.  (Like what a telephone looks like being plugged into the wall and what you did prior to social media!) She tells me what she is excited about. I love hearing her talk about her hopes and dreams. (How we will ride to work together one day!) We share the desires of our heart. I long to spend time with her and to get to know her even more.

Then I had that moment, as I long to spend more time with her so that I can know her better. Our Heavenly Father is longing to do the same with me.  While He knows the desires of my heart, He wants to hear from me. He wants to share. He wants me to dive deep into His word to learn lessons He has for me.  He wants every piece of me to love Him and to show it.

MP's memory verse for this week is perfect for what I want (and what God wants) for our relationship to be.

"Love The Lord your God with all of your heart and with all of your soul and with all of your strength." Deuteronomy 6:5

But even greater than that go to verse 7!

"Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up." Deuteronomy 6:7

Oh, how beautiful it is to talk about how we can love The Lord in our daily life. What does it look like to Love The Lord at school? Even in middle school? You bet! You don't gossip, you look for opportunities to be a friend, you are loyal, you are encouraging, you are honest in your work.

I treasure my time with MP. I love getting to know her. I treasure my time with my Heavenly Father. I love getting to know His plan for my life. I love that He gave us these verses this week to remind us to talk about this every day when we wake up and when we lie down.

Lord,
May we continue to trace events and happenings back to Your plan for our life. Fill our child with the love and an unending desire to know Your word. Help our lives to be an example of Your love for us. Help us to see Your glory in the rain storms and in the rainbow that follows.  We want to love You with our mind and our would and our strength.
Amen

Recalculating

I had never been there before. So, as I usually do, I punched in the address for directions. I set out and with each turn felt more secure in my path. 

Then, I heard those words....recalculating...I had missed a turn.  But, now I had a new route. I thought about how comforting it is to have a pre- planned route. How good it feels to hear, "Your destination is ahead on the right."  

Sometimes I feel like I'm recalculating in my walk with Christ. Did I miss a turn? I often wish I understood the route.  We prayed this year for direction and thought we had our answer. But, it wasn't going as planned...recalculating...had we misunderstood the direction He had given us? I doubt it. I believe we misunderstood why He wanted us to be on this path. We had prayed for one reason, but I felt Him telling us - I answered your prayer, but not for the reason you prayed. There was another purpose in this path.  

Our Godly Prayer Strategy (GPS) was in full working order. We had laid out our request and placed the prayer for direction. We had waited patiently for the answer. But, still felt like we were recalculating. We expected joy - we anticipated fun - we received fear and disappointment. My first thought was to turn "this car" around! But, the more we prayed the more our minds opened and we started to be more aware of what other reasons might be for this new path.

Some journeys would be easier if I knew the outcome before we set out on the road.

It is hard when you realize the path that the GPS returns May have some bumps in the road.  

I am thankful that in most cases, I can look back on hard roads and see pieces of His glory in that path.  

We commit this journey to You. We wait anxiously for You to reveal Your plan. If You choose to open our eyes, we ask that you show us now or in future years how Your detour led to Your glory. For now, we will rejoice in our ever faithful GPS.

“You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.”

‭‭Psalm‬ ‭16:11‬ ‭NIV‬‬

My Husband....Her Daddy...Two lucky girls

My husband....Her Daddy....

December 23, 1992 changed the direction of my life. I was wrapping gifts at Sam Frank and Moore when the door opened and a handsome young man walks in.  My mom asked me to wait on him. He wanted to buy his mom a gift for Christmas. We found the perfect things and my mom (little did I know what she was up to!), offered for us to wrap them and deliver them after work.  Giving me one more chance that day to see the handsome man.  

Our first date followed and the rest is history! A man who sought The Lord. A man who loved his family without question. A man who made me feel like I was a better person. A man who sacrificed to give me anything my heart desired. 

We've now been together for 24 years and married for 21 of those.  Little did I know that a month after we met he had bought a slide bracelet for me that would signify all of our major moments.  He gave it to me just 4 weeks after our first date and told me we would fill it up with slides to signify our journey.  (Hard to break up with him after that! Ha ha) The last slide on the bracelet was given the day Mary-Peyton was born.  A priceless gift holding precious memories.  Meant to be a daddy.

This man that I chose was meant to be a daddy. He would move heaven and earth for our child. He has played American Girl more hours than I can count. He knows the name of each one.  He cherishes bedtime stories and hearing about her day.  His heart breaks in unison with hers. Her joy is his joy. A tough man with a soft heart for this child of ours.  He is tough and I love to see how he struggles to hold her to a high standard. Yes, it would be easier to let it slide, but in the long run he was .....Meant to be a daddy.  

I love him more now than I did on that day 24 years ago and I thought that wasn't possible. But, seeing him be a daddy created a new level of love for him. He continues to sacrifice. He somehow manages the growing hormone swings at our house. He seeks to make our way easy. He is a great math helper (that may be my favorite part!) He is a horrible speller (sorry MP!). Even when he is tired he has time for her. What more could a girl ask for. Meant to be a daddy.

They laugh the same. They think the same jokes are funny.  They have identical smiles. They crack each other up and make each other crazy! He loves to "get her goat"! There is nothing he wouldn't do for this little girl.  They gang up on me and there is no hope. They laugh and love to play jokes on me.  Her first love. Meant to be a daddy.

John, words are difficult to express how lucky we are to have you as her daddy. One thing for sure...You were meant to be a daddy. 

Happy Daddy's Day 2016

“Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭22:6‬ ‭ESV‬‬

If The Armor Fits

Romans 8:26 says, "Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness.  For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groaning a too deep for words."

I am so shy! Some of you would never believe that I am so painfully shy! Looking back at old photos you need to just look down - that would be me hiding behind my mom's leg! Even as an adult, my happy place is in a small group of people that love me.

I don't like being shy. It makes me mad that I still have anxiety when I walk into a room by myself! I am seeking out a friendly face! Please! Someone ask me to sit with you! I am immediately taken back to my High School lunch room and the feeling of no one wanting me to sit with them. I hate it!

In college it came time to decide what I would "be" when I grew up.  Well, something I can do in a small group. Something where I don't have to talk much. I even went so far to take (and passed) the air traffic controller exam. A few people in a tower - sounded good to me. Thankfully His plan was different. I got my degree in Management Information Systems and Computer Science and envisioned life behind a computer screen. That wouldn't be His plan either!

He opened a door in Banking - a door where I would deal with hundreds of people every day. A wonderful career where I would have to make quick and costly decisions. I would have to be a leader. I would speak to hundreds of people on a normal basis. I would need to be confident. This didn't come naturally.

I remember talking to my mom in the early years of my career. I shared with her that I felt like I was putting on a mask each day to be someone I'm not. I felt like a phony.  What she said next changed my confidence level for each day.....She said, "You aren't putting on a mask to cover up who you are. You are putting on the Armor of God to become who He wants you to be."

All this time I felt like I was hiding my true self - when what was happening was allowing Him to transform me into the person He wants me to be. Instead of feeling weak - I can feel strong because He is guiding my growth. He has placed me in this position for His glory. Shy or not - I am growing in my armor.

He knew my shyness - yet opened the door for my career and community passions.

He knew my weakness - yet has been faithful to provide comfort and peace along the way.

He knew my fear - yet has and continues to open doors that I only need to walk thru and He provides the confidence.

His plan is better than my plan - even when it takes me out of my comfort zone. Because when I am out of my zone - I am covered in His armor.

Ephesians 6:10-11 "Finally, be strong in The Lord and the strength of His might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil."

Lord,
Thank you for Your armor. Thank you for knowing my doubts and fears and then taking me so far outside of my comfort zone that I can only give You the glory. You shine in these times because Your light is reflecting off the armor You have provided.  I am weak without it. May I trust that Your way is always better than my way. May it always bring You glory.
Amen

If I could graduate again...my Top 10 pieces of advice

What an exciting time! Your first piece of independence. No one there to tell you to go to sleep (or wake up!)! I was in your shoes not so very long ago. Looking back there were a few things I wish I had done differently....here are some little bits of advice from my journey.

10. Study abroad if you can. Go on a mission trip if you can.  Not everyone can do it - but I am amazed as I look at resumes today how many graduates of college have spent time in other counties. 90% of the resumes I see have some time abroad. If you get the chance - don't waste the opportunity to share the good news! It will also help you appreciate what you have and where you live.
"Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Ghost" Matthew 28:19

9. Find a way to make a difference. It doesn't matter what city you are in - there are needs.  My sweetest memories were spent in a 2nd grade class in Tuscaloosa with little kids who couldn't wait to see me each week! Finding your place to serve will help you in many ways - it is rewarding, it needs to be done, it relieves stress, it can help uncover your gifts and you have less free time. (Also a great item for any resume)!
"Whatever you do, work heartily, as for The Lord and not for man." Col 3:23

8.  Call home at least once a week.  Your parents have spent 18 years pouring every minute and dollar into you. Honor their gift and call them! Share what is happening - Share how they can pray for you. You need to be reminded of where you came from and they need to know they did a good job raising you! Call them!
"Honor your father and your mother." Eph 6:2

7.  Put your Bible by your bed.  You are much more likely to open it if you can see it. Don't put it on the bookshelf. Put it by your bed. It has served you well before you got to college and it will serve you well now. Keep it where you can see it. Then open it!
"Your word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path." Pam 119:105

6.  Join a team or a club.  This one goes without saying. You know it's true. Idle time is not good. Find a group that you share a passion and share an interest.  These people will help hold you accountable.  Dance team, a sport, math club - it gives you a place to fit it. It will help minimize your free time.
"The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing, while the soul of the diligent is richly supplied."  Prov 13:4

5.  Be a good friend. You will meet lots of new people. You will make lots of new friends (See #2).  Sometimes all you have is your reputation.  Have people be able to count on you.  Be trustworthy. Trust is very difficult to regain once it has been lost.  Be kind. Some of my biggest regrets come from short sided decisions and being a poor friend.  Be kind.
"A friend loves at all times." Prov 17:17

4.  Don't drink and drive and don't ride with anyone who does.  I couldn't do a list without this.  Value your life and that of other people.  You will feel invincible- just this one time- it isn't that far....it only takes one time.  Do not put so little value on your life to end it over alcohol.  One more thing - you can never get addicted to something you never try.  You may see things you've never even drempt of - just leave it alone.
"Be not wise in your own eyes, fear The Lord and turn from evil." Prov 3:7

3.  Choose your friends wisely.  You are from a small town.  Your parents know their parents. Now, you will encounter people who you have no idea what the back story might be.  Be cautious as you build new friendships and relationships.  A good place to start is with #1!
"I thank my God every time I remember you." Phil 1:3

2.  Your decisions while you are in college DO matter.  Some of them will shift the direction of your life forever.  Make sure you are not making short sided decisions that will alter your life in a negative way.  Have fun! Enjoy your independence. But, realize your decisions will follow you.  So think wisely! A quick decision can have lasting implications.
"Search me, O God, and know my heart. Try me and know my thoughts." Psalm 139:23

1. And finally....the mistake I regret most from my first week of college. Get Up and Go to Church! Do it that first Sunday! I was sitting in a dorm where I could walk to church and could see the church steeple from my dorm - but I slept in. I missed a great opportunity to see who might have been some of my best friends. (Because they were bold enough to get up and go to church without anyone telling them to do it!) You've likely gone to church the better part of your life - don't stop. Keep the habit! You will need The Lord now more than ever! You will face new challenges, new friends, new stress. Can't think of a better place to start!
"Commit your way to The Lord, trust in Him and He will act." Psalm 37:5

Lord,
I lift up this year's graduates. Cover them with a hedge of protection. Open their hearts and urge them to seek You on their own.  Surround them with friends that will point them to You.  May their light shine so that others may be brought closer to You.  Give them the words to say when they are confronted with new challenges.  Give them strength when the devil seeks to tempt them.  Comfort their parents as they miss their children.  For those of us who still have time - point us to those instructions to fill their heart and mind so that they might glorify You.
Amen

Being A Duck

If you have been on a team or in the professional world, chances are you have done a personality test at some point.  I've done dozens over my career. While the "character" might change slightly - one thing has remained the same....I am a Duck.

Consider what that means to be a duck....to our eyes they glide across the pond. It looks effortless and beautiful.  What our eyes miss is happening below the surface. Their feet paddling urgently to make that journey.  They are working so hard - but it looks easy on the surface.

I can only assume I was born a duck, since I have an identical duck sister :) It became very obvious early in my career when I would come to work at 8:30 and be ready to leave at 5:00 and not miss a deadline. Those who know me we'll also know I can count on one hand the lunches I've missed over those 21 years.  One manager asked, "How do you do it? You work so efficiently and make it look easy!" I hated to confess that I was a duck. That's what ducks do!

Being a Christian "duck" can also come with challenges. When outsiders see your life they may only see the surface.  Being a transparent Christian I seek to show who it is that is making that glide look easy. If I did not have Christ giving me the strength to make that journey I would have no hope.  "Ducks" May also be tempted not to ask for help because that shows weakness.  That temptation to "handle it" can happen with humans and with Christ.

I have realized even recently how unproductive it is for any personality type to keep those struggles from The Lord.  Do I truly think I can handle something that He can't? I imagine He is quite amused when I pretend I've "got this".

I have never slept.  J always chalked it up to part of being a duck. I convinced my husband that women are just wired differently. One night I got up, so that I wouldn't wake him, and went downstairs. I started reading old prayer journals as I was sitting there so frustrated about not sleeping. Guess what - not one single prayer for help with my sleep. I knelt down beside the sofa and cried out to Him. Ashamed that I was trying to handle this without even asking for help.  You can guess what came next - the best nights sleep I have had in years.

Lord, thank you for making me aware of my trait to make this life look easy.  Thank you for revealing the areas in my life that I have kept to myself. Thank you for urging me to be transparent enough to show my faults and struggles. My faults and struggles allow You to be the one and only one helping me glide. Amen

Psalms 57:2 "I cry out to God Most High. To God who fulfills His purpose for me."